All is Fair in Skunks and War
by princessbinas
Summary: What happens when Inuyasha encounters a skunk? Will he be free of the stench or will he forever smell worse than the world's smelliest flower? K for safety. This is also a fun way to learn how to remove skunk smell. So basically, truth in fanfiction! Hope it's helpful too!


**Binas:** I had this little one shot idea today. He he he... Like the title says, skunks are involved... XD

By the way, let's say Miroku went to go 'purify', as I say, a house. Sango followed to be sure he didn't grab any female butts.

* * *

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* * *

"COME BACK HERE YOU MANGY THIEF!"

Inuyasha dashed through the woods with his Tessaiga in the air. He swung it at the silhouette of an animal.

"GIVE BACK MY RAMEN!", Inuyasha yelled and swung his sword again.

A bigger silhouette appeared and once light hit it, Inuyasha gave look of surprise. It was a giant skunk demon. He got a cocky look and jabbed his sword at the skunk demon.

"HA! Do you really think you can make me run away like all of those pathetic humans do? Well your wrong!", Inuyasha said and swung his sword at the skunk demon.

The skunk demon let out a shriek and it summoned an entire herd of skunks.

"What ya going to do to me? Have them spray me?", Inuyasha asked.

All of the skunks, including the skunk demon, turned around and lifted up their tails. Inuyasha's face face fell.

"Oh come on! I was joking!", Inuyasha complained as he got sprayed on, "I hate skunks and skunk demons... GAK!"

Inuyasha fainted from the overwhelming stench of the skunk odor.

* * *

_Thirty minutes later..._

"INUYASHA! WHERE ARE YOU?", Kagome called, "Where is he?"

"Maybe he got attacked by a demon stronger than him.", Shippo said with worry.

"Don't worry we will find him.", Kagome said.

"Wait! I hear something!", Shippo said and dashed off to see Inuyasha lying on the ground completely passed out, "KAGOME! I FOUND HIM! HE'S KNOCKED OUT! *sniff* *sniff* *sniff* GAK! HE ALSO SMELLS REALLY BAD!"

"What did he do this time?", Kagome asked and immediately plugged her nose, "Is that smell what I think it is?!"

"Do you think Inuyasha tried to avoid bath time again?", Shippo asked.

"No Shippo. This is the work of a skunk.", Kagome said, "I guess that's what stole his ramen..."

"SKUNKS?!", Shippo asked in fright, "WHERE?! PLEASE DON'T LET THEM SPRAY ME!"

"Calm down Shippo. I am sure Inuyasha scared them away after spraying him.", Kagome said.

"What the heck happened?", Inuyasha asked finally waking up and immediately plugged his nose, "What the heck is that foul smell?!"

"It's you stupid! You got sprayed on by a bunch of skunks!", Shippo said.

"Shut your mouth Shippo before I rip it off...", Inuyasha growled.

"Inuyasha what were you thinking?!", Kagome asked.

"They stole my ramen and I chased them to get it back!", Inuyasha said.

"You scared them! Skunks only spray if they get scared!", Kagome said.

"So they were a bunch of cowards. Figures... Maybe I should go find those stinkin' skunks and give them a nice butt kicking!", Inuyasha boasted.

"INUYASHA!", Kagome yelled.

"Oh crud. KAGOME! NO! DON'T!", Inuyasha pleaded.

"SIT!"

Inuyasha crashed into the ground. As this happened, he let go of his nose and got another whiff of the odor, causing him to get knocked out again.

"Inuyasha... Grow up would ya?", Shippo asked.

* * *

_Later in a near by village..._

Kagome, Inuyasha, and Shippo managed to find some clothes pins to put on their noses. Inuyasha was thankful but now also had something worse than a sit in Kagome's arsenal. She told him to behave or she would remove the clothes pin and then sit him, which led to an accidental sit.

"I think this will work!", Inuyasha said and dove into a mud pit and started bathing in it.

In the end, the mud made him smell worse.

* * *

They tried a regular bath and all of the herbal soaps the village was able to make, that too failed.

"AM I GONNA STINK LIKE THIS FOR THE REST OF MY HECTIC LIFE?!", Inuyasha yelled to the sky just to get another sit.

* * *

They tried the fabled tomato juice/paste remedy. It 'worked' for a time, but failed in the end.

"YOU SAID THIS WOULD WORK KAGOME!", Inuyasha yelled in complete angered.

"Sit boy...", Kagome said and Inuyasha fell to the ground.

"Why does this keep on happening?"

* * *

_Later at sun set back in Kaede's Village..._

"Kagome! There has to be something else we can try!", Shippo said adding another clothes pin to his nose for the smell got stronger again from their latest attempt, cow manure, "Anything's better than Inuyasha trying to think of something to 'get rid' of the stench..."

Inuyasha though manure would help but ignored Kagome's warnings. In the end, he smelled even worse, forcing him to sit outside the village due to how bad he smelled.

"That is why I am going back to my own time. Maybe my mom has a good idea on how to get rid of the smell.", Kagome said climbing into the Bone Eater's Well.

"Good luck Kagome!", Shippo said.

* * *

_The next day..._

"COME ON! LET ME IN!", Inuyasha yelled as the heavy rains poured.

"No! You smell! Go take a bath first.", A villager said before slamming the door to avoid the awful stench.

"I TRIED THAT YESTERDAY!", Inuyasha yelled.

Shippo scampered towards Inuyasha with a few giant leaves. He handed one to Inuyasha.

"Here. This should keep you dry until Kagome gets back.", Shippo said.

"SHE LEFT?!", Inuyasha yelled.

"She left to see if her mom knew how to remove the smell. She should be back soon.", Shippo said.

* * *

_Ten minutes later after the rains stopped..._

"Inuyasha! Mom told me how to remove the stench.", Kagome said carrying two large bottles and a large box.

"What the heck is that stuff?", Inuyasha asked.

"It's Hydrogen Peroxide, baking soda, and a large bottle of hand soap.", Kagome said, "It's suppose to actually remove the stench, not just cover it up like the tomato paste and juice."

"Well then hurry up and use the stuff already! I am tired of the stench already!", Inuyasha said.

Shippo managed to find an open jar and a tub that could fit Inuyasha if he squatted in it. Kagome filled it up with water and started mixing the items together. Kagome and Shippo lathered Inuyasha with it, also being careful around the eyes.

"Is it suppose to bubble like this?", Shippo asked.

"That means it's removing the chemicals in the skunk spray. We just need to wait for the bubbles to stop before rinsing it off.", Kagome said.

After about five minutes, they rinsed off the mixture. The smell was all gone.

"Ha! I am stench free!", Inuyasha said in relief and throwing the clothes pin away.

"Now you see why we avoid skunks?", Kagome asked.

"Not really. If another comes near me, I am gonna kill it before it can spray me!", Inuyasha said.

"INUYASHA..."

"Not again! Please no!"

"SIT BOY! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! YOU WILL NOT KILL ANY SKUNKS! DEAD SKUNKS SMELL EVEN WORSE THAN THEIR SPRAYS! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIIIIIITTTT!", Kagome shrieked as Inuyasha went deeper in the ground for all the sit commands.


End file.
